after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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