You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
