maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
