She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i think i have herpe
just one?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
