I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize
