Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize