I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
This house was built for laser tag.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Randomize
