I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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