Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize