You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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