WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
