My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
