He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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