Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
