i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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