Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
