do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
