i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
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