genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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