It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
