I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
