So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize