I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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