Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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