I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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