can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
