all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize