we're chasing vodka with high fives
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
