We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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