wake up i wanna do it froggy style
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize
