I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
