I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize