let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
