whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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