i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
