Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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