Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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