the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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