What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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