Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
