So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
