mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
