What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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