Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
