I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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