i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
