There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
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You. Win. At. Life.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
