I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
