Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
