I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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