I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
